Having “bartender ears” can be very beneficial to a lot of us that work in the trade, you hear a lot of things like funny jokes or you may overhear the beginnings of situation that you might need to intervene in, then there are the things you can’t unhear. Sexy talk can be entertaining or gross depending on who’s saying it and what they’re saying, loud talkers oversharing family incidents or alien abductions can help you figure out where a person is coming from, and then there was the chick last night. I was minding my own business attending to my closing duties when I hear a woman say “You know, he was using heroin in my bathroom and I told him not to do that before, so I tried to stab him, not to hurt him but to make him think about not doing that.” I just kept cleaning, but in my head, I was like “What!?!That’s how you try to help someone!?! I can think of a few more positive ways to deal with this situation!” Now, don’t get me wrong, getting stabby can definitely let someone know how you feel about what they’re doing, but then I digress. The next thing she says is “Well, it doesn’t matter, he’s dead now anyway, not from me stabbing him though.” Just act like you didn’t hear anything and don’t make eye contact! The guy she was talking to didn’t seem to be fazed one bit and just kept on with the conversation like it was normal, I can’t say I would have done the same. I would have excused myself to go use the bathroom, never to be seen again. Who needs that coat anyway? Thankfully there is a couple of feet of Formica between me and stabby Joe, that is always comforting.