Of Ranch and Pride

Usually, toward the end of a fun filled debaucherous evening, the mind and stomach start to wander towards some sort of sustenance to lessen the blow of the impending hangover. The need to gorge one’s self on some sort of comfort type food could stem from a subconscious survival override mechanism or possibly it’s just a continuation of an evening of reckless gluttony. Either way, the urges are real and when the tantalizing smells of the deep fryer hit your nose, there is no stopping the feast of goodness that is about to make your life complete. Now, having seen this story play out every night that I work you see how some people go about handling themselves in this situation. Some order food to share with the rest of their party, some people graze off of their friend’s plates while others take a different approach. It’s kind of like a starving dog at their food bowl, do not put your hand in there or you might be pulling back a bloody stump. There was just such a ravenous eating machine in last night that, after having devoured their food in record setting time, proceeded to wipe the last of the ranch dressing out of the container with her finger and lick it all up with a very satisfied glow about them. I guess sometimes you just have to relish every last moment, knowing that soon the evening will be over and a new day will be waiting to greet you with a head throbbing, gut wrenching reminder of all the fun you had. Cheers to you ranch dressing licker, may your liver rebound quickly! 

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